musafir mencari ilmu ALLAH

to the pakcik who’s sleeping.

After a day of hearing heartbeats,

wishing they were all normal but to hear some which are not.

Between hoping the best and to learn abnormalities,

Between awe to God’s Creations, and heart-breaking truths.

After all that, in a nice journey home.

With all the springs going into deceleration mode.

Beside me was an old frail man, sitting as still he could,

and with a glimpse of the eyes God Lent to me,

He was very fast asleep.

Deep in my heart I whispered,

to him who stayed quiet, even if he agrees or not, he will still remain silent.

Dearest ‘pakcik’ I just wondered how the days were,

When you were strong, when you were able to rule the world, when you were vibrantly young,

when all colours were colours of happiness, when wrinkles and brittle bones seen so far far away,

when all the happiness in this world is thought to be forever bliss,

when all friends would promise to face all laughter and tears together,

when everyday’s there is a promised tomorrow,

when death and grave seems to never happen…

Dearest ‘pakcik’ I’m so curious as a cat,

If you have ever thought from where we came from,

From where did all these wonderful flowers bloom,

How did the Mars and Jupiter and Saturn and Earth,

Never ever seem to clash though all surround the sun,

To where we’re heading to,

Is it to south, north , east or west,

When all those bliss just fade away and what surrounds us is only death,

Is there a purpose of living this life,

is there a something for us to do,

 Or is it just about being born, then live for a good few years, then let the grey hair invades, then. . .

See your children grow up, then them have kids, have grandchildren, then…

that’s it?

Do all these tests purposely given,

Do the sufferings sent due to no reasons,

Do rainbows just popped in after every rain fullstop?

Do tears fall down just because we were sad?

Do hearts get clean without any cleansers?

Do smiles sooth us just because they were like that?

Is there no reason why we lived,

Is there no direction we are heading,

Is there no reason for each to occur,

Is life just like that; born live and die?


“And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me – indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.”

(Al Quran, Surah Al Baqarah, Verse 186)

Dearest ‘Pakcik’ whom I really care,

Indeed this world seemed the most beautiful for those who never think far,

For the Creator of all creations is the Most Generous,

There is indeed a promised eternal bliss,

so different from the temporary ones in these world.

There is indeed a forever young session in the hereafer,

and a world free from worries, sorrow or fears.

That is promised to those who are steadfast,

Firm and strong, in upholding the truth and nothing but the truth,

of this very short period of life,

of the real deen which lights up minds and souls,

Of the way of life which explains everything.

Where each problem has its own answers,

but still,

The ONE Knows best.



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